I've Married Into Insanity
by Surflilu246
Summary: Taiora oneshot. Stuck in traffic, Sora reflects on her marriage to Taichi and all the crazy happenings that come with it. Little does she know that Taichi has another suprise planned for when she gets home.


An auburn haired girl sat in her car. Rush hour traffic was at it's worst as she was heading back home to Odaiba. She had been instructed by her husband to come home late that day, and seeing the lanes of traffic in front of her, she guessed that wouldn't be a problem. She wasn't stupid either, though. Today happenned to be her birthday, and for some reason, Taichi Yagami didn't think she'd remember. Thoughts filled her mind as she wondered what the man of her dreams would have planned for her when she returned to their appartment. Hopefully it wouldn't involve explosions, fire, floods, or any other kind of general destruction. Sora laughed to herself as she pushed on the gas, slowly moving foward. Memories began to fill her head. It'd been quite a year since they'd been married, and during that year, Taichi had managed to pull more shenanigans than Sora could count.

_First, there was Christmas Eve. Her husband had suprised her when he brought home the largest christmas tree he could find. Unfortunetly, though, he bought it a little too big. Sora cringed as the branches scraped along her newly painted ceiling. _

_"It's fine, it's fine, I've got it." Taichi reassured her, brushing her aside. He hoisted the tree into its stand. Sora backed up and looked at it. She couldn't find the words to tell Taichi what she thought of their J-shaped christmas tree. Well, an upside down J, she suppossed. _

_"Don't you think you should cut it?" Sora asked him, meaning well, of course._

_"No, no. I bought it big to have it big!" Her husband exclaimed._

_"Oh.. okay.." Sora had quickly decided her opinion wasn't wanted, although she was sure it was needed. She smiled nonetheless, and took a seat, preparing herself for the show that was about to unfold. "Where are the lights?" She asked teasingly. "There's no Christmas without lights!"_

_Taichi glanced at her through slited eyes. "I know, __**dearest**__. I was getting there."_

_Sora chuckled. He was so cute when he was frustrated. She took a sip of the champagne that she held in her hand and continued watching her frazzled husband. 'Uh oh', she thought to herself as Taichi proceeded to take the lights out of the box. "I think I'm going to get some wine instead.." Sora mumbled, more to herself then her husband. She knew she'd need the relief sometime soon. She took one last look at the brown haired man. He carried what looked like pounds of colored lights in his arms, wobbling back and forth as he headed towards the tree. She smiled. At least her life was never boring. _

_Sora turned the corner and walked into the kitchen. She hummed a christmas carol to herself as she popped the cork out of an unopened bottle. Maybe tonight she should pour a little more than she normally did, just incase this whole 'tree' thing didn't go as smoothly as Taichi had planned. However, if the girl was going to, she didn't get the chance. _

_*CRASH!* A loud sound, something like the sound of a falling tree, came from the living room, followed by the sound of smashing glass and mumbled curses. Sora dropped her wine and ran towards the living room. "TAICHI!" She threw her hand over her chest as she saw the sight before her._

_Across the ground laid an empty, green christmas tree. Needles were everywhere. Taichi laid next to it, covered in lights and garland. Sora tried to cover her mouth, but she couldn't help the hysterical laughter that forced it's way out. "Taichi you make a better decoration than the actual Christmas tree does!"_

_The man rolled his head over a looked at his wife. "You're funny. I really don't think I've ever been more amused in my life." He rolled his head back and looked at the ceiling. "I just wanted us to have the perfect first Christmas together.."_

_Sora's eyes widened and a grin spread across her face. "But Taichi.." She walked over and laid down next to him. "This is by far the best Christmas I've ever had." _

_Taichi looked back at her. "I love you." He scooched over and gently kissed her on the lips. _

_"You know," Sora giggled, "I've never kissed anyone under a pine needle covered ceiling before.."_

Sora came back to the present. She hadn't lied that night. It had certainly been the most interesting Christmas of her life, to say the least. Again, she moved foward a couple feet in traffic. 'Ugh this is going to take forever.' she thought. 'People need to move faster. I need to get home before my husband floods the house..'

If he did somehow manage to flood the house, it wouldn't be the first time. Sora smiled again as she lightly pushed down on the breaks. It was only a couple of months ago..

_"Taichi, listen to me, there's no way you can turn our balcony into a swimming pool."_

_"And why not? Plenty of people have swimming pools on their balconies!"_

_"Name three."_

_"You know... those celebrities..."_

_Sora shook her head in disbelief. She couldn't believe what she had walked in on. She'd just gotten home from the supermarket, and found a strange hose connected to their kitchen sink. She followed it until it led her to where she now stood. _

_"Taichi, no one in Odaiba has a pool on their balcony."_

_"You don't know that."_

_"Fine, well no one has made their own swimming pool on their balcony."_

_"You don't know that either."_

_"You're right, let me correct myself, no one in their __**right mind**__ has built a swimming pool on their balcony."_

_Only then did Taichi look up from his work. "Ha. I told you you didn't know that."_

_Sora smacked her forehead and walked back inside, being sure to step over the big rectangular piece of plastic that was now in front of it. Somehow, Taichi had managed to build a whole box. When he did this, Sora had no idea, but she was making sure she had no part in it. _

_"Will you turn the water on for me?" Taichi called after her._

_Pretending she didn't hear him, the girl walked into their bedroom. 'Insanity,' she thought to herself, 'pure insanity.'_

_"Fine! I'll turn it on myself!" Sora heard Taichi call as he walked inside. She laughed as she picked up a book to read. Perhaps if she just hoped for the best.._

_"Damn cat. Shoo! Get off the counter!" Taichi yelled at his ancient pet, Miko, as he went to turn on the nozzle. "Why in the world are you still alive!" _

_Miko growled before he skittered away._

_"Excellent." Taichi said to himself as he watched the water travel through the hose. When he saw liquid come out the other end, he dashed out to the balcony to watch his glorious invention fill up._

_"Sora! Sora! Come quick! It's working!"_

_In the other room, Sora put down her book. "Oh no.." She anxiously walked outside, and to her suprise she saw, well, a box full of water. "Oh my. Well.. I guess it's not.. too bad.."_

_"You like it?!" Taichi stared at her, a look of pride and accomplishment on his face._

_Who was Sora to take that away from him? "Yes Taichi, I love it." He punched the air in a fit of joy. But then.._

_"MIKO! NO!" Taichi jumped up and dove at the cat. He was chewing the hose! "Get away from that you stupid cat!" Unfortunately, he was too late. Mike had torn right through the hose, sending water everywhere. _

_"Taichi!" Sora squealed from behind him. "Stop the water! Stop the water!" She ran into the room after him. The hose was flying around everywhere due to the water pressure. Sora tried to grab it, but it still felt like the house was raining. "Taichi stop chasing the cat and help!"_

_The boy stopped in his tracks and turned to look at his wife. She was hopping around the room, trying to get a hold of the hose. "I'm coming!" He dashed over to her side and tried grabbing it. When that failed, Sora turned to him. Water was still shooting everywhere. "Taichi! The water!"_

_"The water? I'm tryi- YES." He ran towards the kitchen and dove over the sink. Smacking the knob with his fist, he turned the water off. _

_"T-t-taichi!_

_He ran back out into the living room to see Sora standing with a horrified look on her face. _

_"Sora! My...my pool!" His jaw dropped as he pointed outside. The plastic had been ripped apart from Taichi's chase with Miko. _

_"Your pool?! My house!" Sora threw her hands in the air._

_"I, uh, I..." Taichi stopped and looked around. The walls and furniture were soaked. Puddles of water had formed everywhere, and books and picture frames lay piled on the ground. "I can totally make this up to you."_

And it was because of that that Sora got the best dinner of her life. Taichi didn't cook it of course, he took her out. The woman's stomach grumbled as she tightened her grip on the steering wheel. Hopefully Taichi had made her something for dinner.. or better yet, hopefully Taichi had ordered take out. The traffic had started to clear, and Sora could now drive at a steady pace. Maybe Taichi would have cake.. The girl was really in the mood for some sweets. Except, Taichi and cake didn't really mix.

_It was the night of their wedding. The reception had begun, and everyone was enjoying themselves. Dinner was wonderful, and the cake looked delicious. It stood on a table in front of the dance floor. The tripple tiered white masterpeice was just begging to be eaten. _

_Sora gripped a long knife as Taichi put his hand over hers. Together, they cut the first piece. They picked up their respective forks and piled cake on them, eyeing one another._

_"Taichi I swear to God if you spread cake all over my face.." Sora began, in a loving, yet threatning way._

_Her new husband looked her up and down. "Why would I do that? You look beautiful."_

_Sora let a sigh of relief escape her lips. _

_"But you'd look more beautiful with cake on your face!" Taichi quickly spread his cake-filled fork across her cheek._

_"Taichi! You! YOU! ...You're finished!" Sora took her entire plate and smashed it against his face. _

_In response, Taichi ran his own hand over is mouth, and rubbed it in Sora's hair. The wedding guests watched in horror as an all out cake battle began. Icing flew everywhere as the newlyweds struggled to have the last throw. Taichi's head was completley covered in the dessert. Icing was spread throughout his poofy hair and crumbs dangled off his shirt. Sora was a disaster as well. Her makeup was ruined, and her entire face looked pale from the white cake. Icing dripped off her chin and fell down onto her dress._

_The bride finally stepped back. She took one good look at her husband and laughed. _

_"What, I'm not good looking enough for you anymore?" He said to her teasingly before pulling her into a sweet, sweet kiss. _

Sora smiled as she recalled what was argueably the best night of her life. She slowly turned the car onto her road, giving Taichi the most time he could get. However, she sped up once she saw red lights flashing in the parking lot. 'What is that..?'

Sora pulled in to find two large firetrucks stationed near the entrance.

"Taichi!" Sora quickly parked her car and jumped out, dashing up the stairs. She knew this was her husband's doing. What had he gotten himself into this time?

When she reached her floor, she picked up speed. Sora was almost at her door... when suddenly, it opened. Three firemen left the appartment carrying fire extinguishers and fire blankets. "What happened to my house?" Sora said, not as frantically as she would of if the firemen hadn't looked so calm.

"Small fire." They replied. "It's out though, nothing to worry about."

Sora looked past them into the doorway. She saw her husband standing there with an 'I'm sorry' look on his face. "Taichi, what happened?"

The boy simply looked down at his hands. Sora's eyes followed. He was holding a birthday cake, burnt to the crisp. "I'm sorry Sora. I wanted to make you a cake, but I guess I'm not that great of a cook..."

"Taichi...." Sora couldn't help but smile. "It's the thought that counts."

"I love you Sora." Taichi weakly smiled.

"I love you too. But, what's wrong?" Sora raised an eyebrow

Taichi gulped. 'Well, first, let me just tell you that I'm getting you a stove for your birthday."

"Why?"

"Let's just leave it at don't go in the kitchen for awhile."

"Taichi!!!!"

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**Hope you liked it :). **

**Reviews are appreciated!**

***surflilu**


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